Apartment Recordings

by Carling Berkhout

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1.
Nightmares 04:21
i miss pretending to be asleep so i can feel you next to me i'm tired of dreaming to the sirens red lights in a city horizon nightmares that wake me up crying dreamt of bad times we had bad times i didn't trust all the signs i'm waking up to the birds dying mourning dove flew into my wind chime i didn't trust all the signs i didn't want it to die dead flowers in the summertime bad luck for a year why'd you give me a dead bouquet with the pretty ones so near dreamt of my dog dead in the road hit by your car on a monday and how was i supposed to know to leave before the hard times these have been hard times when i'm stuck in old times even though my garden's overgrown with sour weeds and memories that haven't been watered dead flowers in the summertime bad luck for a year why'd you give me a dead bouquet with the pretty ones so near
2.
put my heart on the table and i left for awhile the pain i've been feeling takes to the city so well i'm a nighttime monster who's scared of the dark built a garden on the rooftop thought it was a form of self care flowers and weeds look the same when they're just seeds i killed them all anyway forgot to water me i still feel the pain i'm a kid and it hurts real bad i looked for signs that you'd leave so quickly but darling i found nothing at all and how do i deserve this pain that i feel in my heart i feel heartache so hard it's always on my mind but i walk to the beat of my song i don't waltz in time i'm a dancer by moonlight but i tiptoe in day there's loneliness held in the weight of my eyes i just need to know if i'm doing one thing right i'll look for the answer downtown in brooklyn tonight and i still feel the pain and i still feel the pain and i still feel the pain i'm a kid and it hurts real bad i looked for signs that you'd leave so quickly but darling i found nothing at all and how do i deserve this pain that i feel in my heart
3.
Little Heart 01:52
pray for my little heart it's gone, it cannot stay who'd break my little heart so bad its gone away
4.
i coughed up his spit tastes like bloody lies i kissed men who i knew were up to no good and well he was no saint in the bedroom don't have to think twice i'm not talking funny business nothing's very funny anymore did you just need me here to help dry your tears it takes a lot for me to say it's okay, i don't care and well you ripped me apart again only need me when i'm near i'm not talking funny business nothing's very funny anymore you're a backstabbing traitor my heart is a crater i used to tell jokes now i can't love hurts the most when it's leaving even more when it's gone i'm not talking funny business nothing's very funny anymore
5.
darling, oh darling darling can't you see i've come a long way a long way for me we sing under the willow tree took the wrong right turn to north country and now i see boy, oh boy boy in the railroad hat let's make our way to san jose oh put me in your sack we hum under the willow tree took the wrong right turn to north country and now i see
6.
City Blues 02:36
i'm walking down amsterdam i wish that it was raining i left things unsaid and i can't take the bruising when i'm traveling on the subway i like that i can't see nothing helps to know that nothing's passing by you're my city blues and i don't miss you only when i'm stuck in the traffic and my heart thinks i need you i don't miss your fears but i wish you were home tonight i'll leave the light on and hope that you're alright i watch the family in the home across from mine i'm scared of nothing but running out of time you're my city blues and i don't miss you only when i'm stuck in the traffic and my heart thinks i need you

about

recorded in a new york city apartment on 34th street

Carling Berkhout: guitar, banjo, vocals
Charlie Rauh: backup guitar on tracks 2 & 4

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released March 28, 2018

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